Monday, February 1, 2010

One Month Into This

2010. You. Are. Not. My. Friend.
Well so far anyway.

The start to my year has been rough. I mean I realize that there are worse things happening to others, but for me, in my world right now, I have been having an emotionally draining time of things.

Breakups Suck.
Fighting with friends sucks.
Having issues with family members sucks.
Having a career dilemma sucks.
Trying to save money sucks.
Owing in taxes sucks.
Not having my own place yet sucks.
Unexpected car expenses sucks.

I am sure you are getting the overall gist of how my month has been.

However, the most difficult for me, at the moment, is the breakup. The one person that has made things feel right and made me laugh is no longer. Poof! Gone! I cared about this person and him me; so it hurts. My heart is confused and aching.

I have told myself over and over and over that things will get better. They have to right? And I tell myself that all things happen for a reason. And again, I am in a position to tell myself that time is going to be what heals. ARGH! I am a little tired of the "time" thing and the hoping "good" happens thing.

I want happiness. I want love.

Hate hurting. It is not a fun thing to go through. However, I am aware that life has decided to make me take some time to reflect on me, myself, and I.
Yippee! (Sarcasm is happening here - yes)

Every day brings new moments of strength, clarity, confidence, sadness, weakness, and anger. I believe it is all normal but I tell you, it doesn't feel normal.

So there is a quick tid bit of what has been going on in my little world. My life is as always, simply complex!

Deep Breath......

1 comment:

  1. aww D, i'm sorry to hear you've been going thru some crappy stuff. :[
    im sure you've heard this over and over, but just remember, that everything happens for a reason; and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. keep your chin up so you don't miss that better thing thats coming your way! :]